Bessem Touati
1994 - 2020
It is with the greatest sadness that we share the news of the death of our beloved Bessem.
Bessem Touati was born surrounded by love. He came into the world on July 5th, 1994, in Montreal, Quebec, in the home of his parents, Jamel Touati and Anneke van Nooten, and in the presence of his loving family: his brother Shaheen, his grandmother Moira van Nooten, his aunts Margaret and Miriam van Nooten, and two midwives. Bessem arrived quickly and without any fuss, setting the tone for the life of an active person who embraced simplicity. When Bessem was 18 months old it was his turn to welcome the newest family member, his sister Alysa.
Bessem was a sweetheart. He was the jam in the sibling sandwich that stuck the three of them together. Bessem was loving, generous, kind. He was funny, passionate, hard-headed. He was a man of many hats, indeed he was famous for not wanting to remove his hats, and would wear them until they fell apart. He was a wonderful son and grandson. Throughout his years, Bessem was in awe of Opa’s tenacity, and humbled by Grandma’s limitless love. He was an incredible brother. He and his siblings had a remarkable love for each other. He was a loving and loyal friend; his friendship with Jack Terrion was the stuff of legends. He was an athlete and a player of games. He was a bundle of contradictions – he hated rules, but read all the rulebooks. He was practical and a teacher, a builder. He was a dreamer and a poet, he loved music – everything from old time country to rap. He loved babies and children, and they loved him. And he loved to be outside, to walk barefoot on the earth (although gravel didn’t slow him down). His dream was to farm, to remove himself from the noise and artifice of the city, and live where he could be free and independent. He wanted to grow his own food, cut his own wood, and live without the excesses of the world he’d been born into.
Bessem suffered from anxiety, which made much of life a misery, and he chose to look for a path that would let him build a life that would only include those and that which he loved. In his efforts, he experienced joy and sorrow, success and failure, hope and despair. On October 20, 2020, Bessem’s path took him off his grandparents’ farm that he loved so much, and barefoot into the woods. There, surrounded by beauty and the song of birds, he ended his life. He left no note, but to paraphrase his final text to Jack, his heart was full of love.
Bessem leaves behind a large family who love and mourn him. In Canada, his parents, Jamel Touati and Anneke van Nooten, his siblings, Shaheen and Alysa Touati. His grandparents, John and Moira van Nooten, his aunts, Margaret and Miriam van Nooten and family, Helena van Nooten and her family, his uncles Johan and Sebastian van Nooten and family. His uncle Mohamed Touati and family, his cousin Firas Touati and family. His friends, Jack Terrion, Arthur Newton, Liam Buckley, and Christine Gannon. Bessem’s dog Max was his faithful companion during the last year of his life.
In Tunisia and France, the children and grandchildren of his late grandparents, Mima Zohra Khoudja and Baba Azizi Mohamed Moulay Touati: his uncles Abdelkebir Touati and family, Abdellah Touati and family and his aunts, Nijiba Khoudja and family, Amel Touati and family. He was predeceased by Jamila Touati, and her family mourns him. Bessem’s many cousins in Canada and overseas love and will miss him very much.
There will be a private burial on October 23, 2020 at Pinecrest Cemetery. People are welcome to pay their respects on Sunday, October 25th, in the family home and backyard, between 11am and 3pm. Please dress for the weather. The address is 277 Clare Street, Ottawa, K1Z 7E3. For those who wish to visit the gravesite the address is 2500 Baseline Rd, Ottawa, K2C 3H9. From the main entrance turn right and the grave is by the third tree on the left, section 2, lot 61A, with a black gravestone.
Leaving a message at the bottom of the following obituary page for Bessem is much appreciated. https://www.fco-cfo.coop/en/death-notices/bessem-touati-189006/
Should you like to send us a private message, we can be reached at vannooten.anneke@gmailcom and touati.jamel@gmail.com
If you wish to make a donation in Bessem’s name, we suggest HighJinx at 240 Bank Street (https://www.highjinxottawa.com), by e-transfer to highjinx@live.ca
Bessem, we love you and we miss you so much. Who will teach us how to play the games we haven’t learned yet?
Bessem, your last words were “My heart is full of love.” Ours too, full of love for you.
Here is a link to Bessem's obituary:
https://www.fco-cfo.coop/en/death-notices/bessem-touati-189006/
Here is a collection of photos and videos of Bessem from the day he was born until just over a week ago:http://bit.ly/36mZTqn
If you have any photos or videos of Bessem we would be grateful if you share them. You can upload them to this link.
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/13AupSYDSJQods7xY1b6dNw3nxvf_HOvr?usp=sharing
Here’s one of Bessem’s music playlist: http://spoti.fi/35frMkQ
Please find Bessem's memorial card and obituary in English, French and Arabic at this link: http://bit.ly/3klBs1w
Thank you for your friendship and for being part of the beautiful memories we have of Bessem.
What a beautiful obituary. I didn’t know Bessem very well but reading about him made me wish I had known him better. What a tragic event and how difficult this must be for his whole family to bear.
My heart goes out to you at this excruciating time. I hope Bessem has finally found some of the peace that eluded him all his life.
With fondness and love to all of you. Mariam
A beautiful remembrance for a beautiful young man. Thinking of you all.
I am sorry for the loss. I am sending love and prayer in this difficult times.
Please accept my sincere condolences. Having known Bessem in his younger years, he was beautiful in many ways. Full of energy and smiles. Joyful towards all animals, Pesto included. May his energy and love surround you now.
Bless you all.
Dear Anneke, Jamel, Shaheen, and Alysa,
We will treasure our time with this beautiful, smart, creative, unique, loving, handsome man. We have enjoyed our every conversation about weird and deep things, his music choices, his great physical strength and endurance on many job sites, his chocolate chip cookies, his big laugh, beautiful smile and gentle soul. He is cherished by so many. Our hearts are broken with yours. xo
my heart is aching for you all. Jack and Bessem, have been best friends for so long, through, thick and
thin. I feel that I have always known
Bessam, he has always been part of the Terrion family, as am I. he was always gracious at the dinner table avoiding food he did not want to eat but not making it awkward. Jenepher or Jack would quietly serve something else. This may seem a small memory , but it is of Bessam's essence as a kind , generous, loving person, with whom I always felt a warm comfort. Please accept my sincere condolences. with deep love to you all. Katharine Lennox.
my heart is aching for you all. Jack and Bessem, have been best friends for so long, through, thick and
thin. I feel that I have always known
Bessam, he has always been part of the Terrion family, as am I. he was always gracious at the dinner table avoiding food he did not want to eat but not making it awkward. Jenepher or Jack would quietly serve something else. This may seem a small memory , but it is of Bessam's essence as a kind , generous, loving person, with whom I always felt a warm comfort. Please accept my sincere condolences. with deep love to you all. Katharine Lennox.
How absolutely heartbreaking. No one should have to write an obituary for their son. This is such a beautiful tribute to him. May your memories be a blessing and keep him in your hearts. Hugs and much love.
Les mots me manquent ... je partage de tout mon cœur votre douleur. Courage et force à tous. ❤️
Sophie Moulay
Bessem est né au sein d'une magnifique tribue aimante et si diversifiée.
Bessem a reçu et à transmis au sein de ce groupe. Il a pu grandir et accompagner.
Je pense à vous tous, vous qui êtes ses êtres chères.
Mes sincères condoléances.
I am so saddened to hear of Bessems passing. It seems like only last year that great gaggle of Churchill kids were playing sports and having fun. I hope holding onto those memories will help you and your family through this tragic time. God Bless you all.
Dear Anneke, Jamal, Shaheen and Alysa,
I’m so very sorry to hear of Bessem’s passing. My heart goes out to all of you and your extended family. The picture of the same that immediately came to mind was one of him standing in the cubby room of our kindergarten class. Although he was a quiet little guy, he was happily chatting to me about something he had done at home before coming to school. I can still picture exactly how he looked with his beautiful big brown eyes looking up at me. The one way to get him talking was to ask him about his family. I remember how proud he was when Alysa would come with Anneke to pick him up. He always spoke of his big brother with a touch of awe, too. Shaheen was so wise and talented and could reach stuff in tall cupboards! I hope you gain some comfort from the knowledge that, even as a little boy, Bessem loved and felt the love of his family. XO, Michele
At times likes these words seem not to be enough.
But when I think of Bessem, I smile, I smile large!
I remember his carefree ways. His smile and ability to make you feel comfortable. I enjoyed watching him play soccer and the joy that all the boys had at that time. They were young with futures filled with soccer dreams and endless possibilities. That was as much as a gift for them as it was for us as parents.
I am so sorry for your loss, thinking of you all.
We have such a hard time finding the words to express our sadness for your loss. You are such a guiding light for many people and I hope you can continue your great service to this world with the strength and love of friends and family. We have you all in our thoughts and prayers. Take care and find peace and understanding. We love you.
Thank you so much for this. Your words capture succinctly the essential nature of Bessem: a gentle man, full of love, at home with nature and his loving family, who suffered terribly in our dystopic world.... his loss is a tear at the heart. May his memory be a blessing....
With much love...
Mel Segal
What a beautiful and heartfelt obituary. I never met Bessem but know from Anneke he was a delightful young man. Please accept our heartfelt sympathies at this difficult time.
Shelagh and John Needham
The Bassem we remember from several years ago was a soft-spoken, gentle soul who loved music, nature, and his family. And clearly from the beautiful obituary, none of the best in Bessem had changed. His journey grew harder, but it was made with a heart that had been nurtured and filled with love by his many caring family and friends. May he have the chance to share that love with you all again one day.
Our hearts are breaking for you,
Sandra, Dave, Sarah, Alex Bartlett
C'est avec une très grande émotion que nous avons appris cette terrible nouvelle. Nous sommes loin de vous mais pensons très fort à vous tous en ces moments douloureux. Que Bessem repose en paix. Nous vous embrassons très fort.
Our hearts go out to you and your family right now, Anneke. Your tribute to Bessem speaks to the love and joy he brought to your family, as well as the heartache that came with his struggles. Thank you for sharing such an intimate and honest portrait of your beautiful son. We will be thinking and praying for all of you as you grieve, now and in the days to come.
We are devastated by this news. Words fail us.
We are thinking of you all, sending our heartfelt condolences and love.
Sharing your grief,
Jan & Claire in Montreal
My sincere condolences Jamel and family. May God bring you comfort in these difficult times.
Nothing we can possibly write can express our deep sympathies and how saddened we are to hear this. The world will miss Bessam and everything he had yet to offer to it. Your love for him was immense and we remember fondly all of the laughter he would bring to your household when he was younger.
This tribute to Bessem is so beautiful it stings my eyes. Words fail me.
Jamel, I am heart-broken for this tragic loss to you, to Anneke and to all your family. May you find comfort and peace in ever-lasting love.
We are heartbroken to hear this sad news and read this beautiful obituary. We are sending prayers and love for all of you during this difficult time.
Very sad when I heard about Bessem yesterday. I will always remember him as a good person with a bright light in his eyes, and think about his dialogues with Shaheen, how they could finish each others sentences. He will always be with you.
David
My condolences to you Anneke and your family on the loss of a precious son. What can I do but stand with you in silence and prayer.
Dear Anneke
To hear this sad news was such a shock and I am really sorry. Words cannot express my feelings. Nothing is worse than losing a child. Wish you just the strength to put up with it. My heart is with you.
Nous sommes très tristes et nous pensons à tous les souvenirs qu’on a partagé avec Bessem.
Ce sourire remarquable nous manquera à jamais.
Nous pensons à vous Jamel et Anneke. Nous sommes avec vous ❤️
Repose en paix Boubouti
To the family,
Our deepest sympathy. As parents and grandparents we cannot imagine more painful news of our dear ones. You have a wonderful family, surrounded by loving extended family and friends. Bessem has challenged us all but his last message that his heart is full of love, tells us his decision was not to hurt you. Now, it is for us to spread that love among those he loved to give tender care to each other. Something this family has done for generations.
Karin and Owen
I am stunned and deeply saddened after hearing the news of Bessam's passing. I am so sorry for your loss.
I'm holding you all very tightly in my heart and sending you immense love.
I am so sorry for your loss, please accept our condolences. Jamel you are in our thoughts and prayers. May God help you during this difficult time.
Mes sincères condoléances à la famille et aux amis de Bessem. J’apercevais ce charmant grand garçon lorsqu’il venait rendre visite à sa tante Margaret. C’était alors la joie dans le voisinage car il y avait plus d’ambiance qu’à l’accoutumée. Je l’apercevais en grandes palabres avec son frère Shaheen, tous deux assis dans le canapé du jardin joliment fleuri. Je souriais en les voyant si proches et en imaginant les liens forts qui les unissaient. Repose en paix Bessem et courage aux parents et amis au Canada et en Tunisie.
Elliott and I are so sorry for your loss and in our hearts, minds and spirits please know we are wrapping our arms around each of you with the most healing, loving and consoling hugs possible. Wishing you all strength during this difficult time. Lots of love to you all!!
I only know you through John and Moira's Kumpulans, and I remember you and your sister's helping hands at these precious, memorable events.
One cannot begin to find motive and reason for a loved one to depart in this way. It has happened to me too. Time will lessen the pain - slowly, and I know your family and friends will always be there in support of you.
Please accept our sincere condolences on the passing of Bessem, a son, brother and grand son to the different members of the family.
Having a son and grand sons of our own, we can feel and understand the sadness in your hearts, as this loss is hard to bear.
May the Almighty bless and support your family in dealing with your loss.
My thoughts are with you. A lovely tribute, and a heart-breaking loss.
From one family to another, we feel your loss.
What a beautiful tribute.
My sincerest condolences and thoughts are with you at this time.
May you find some comfort in knowing Bessem lived a life full of love, surrounded by family and friends whose lives he has touched, and forever changed.
May he rest in peace.
My deepest sympathies to you and your family. I cannot begin to imagine the depths of your sorrows at this time. Your son sounds like a wonderful person that the world will greatly miss.
Thank you for sharing such a wonderful tribute to him. Although I do not know you or your family personally, the images in your message tug at my heartstrings and give him extended life to touch those who never had the privilege to know him. May his memory live on forever.
So sorry for you loss, Jamel. My sincerest condolences and deepest sympathies to you and your family.
May Bessem rest in peace and his memory lives on ...
I am so sorry for your loss
Thinking of you during your time of loss and sorrow. We don't have to know one another to see the how much your dear Bessem means to you. May you be surrounded by love so that you may heal and cherish your beautiful son always.
I am so very sorry for your loss. May your heart be strengthened, comforted, and surrounded by the support of love from family and friends during this difficult time.
My deepest condolences to you and your family in this time of grief. There are no right words for the pain you and your family feel. I am praying for you all during this heartbreaking time.
Magda
Jamel,
My heart is broken for your and your family. You have my deepest sympathies. I hope the happy memories you have of your son will sustain you through the coming years.
Take care - sending a virtual hug from North Carolina,
Wendy
I am truly saddened for your loss. I did not know Bessem but by reading this beautifull obituary I see that he was a gem and was well loved. I would like to offer to the whole family my deepest condolences. May God bless his soul.
Amicalement,
Nourdine Bouhafs
My deep condolences for you all, you are certainly included on my prayers , I hope you can go through this very difficult time united as a family. I send you my best thoughts and vibes all the way from Mexico.
I'm so very saddened to hear of your loss.
Although I only knew Bessem for a few short years through the Scouting program, I will remember him with great fondness for his snarky sense of humour, his sly smile, and his spontaneity.
I am glad to know that he lived his life on his own terms,
My sincere condolences,
Stephane Lebeau
former Scout Leader
Veuillez recevoir mes sincères condoléances et mes shouhaits de paix et de sérénité pour toute la famille.
I have been in regular contact with Johan and through him have followed the sorrowful events of the past weeks. You and all the family are remembered during my morning and evening prayers. Johan has done an amazing tribute to Bessem online; I am very impressed.
Our deepest condolences on the loss of your son. May your beautiful memories sustain and bring comfort to you during this difficult time .
Our prayers are with you during this time
C’est avec beaucoup de douleur et avec la recherche des mots que nous exprimons notre profonde tristesse pour la douloureuse disparition de notre très cher Bassem.
Que dieu vous renforce. Que dieu vous bénisse.
Dieu miséricordieux
Allah Yarham Bassem
Rabbi isabbarna 3ala Fre9ou
De tout notre cœur
AbdelkebirFerida
Repose en paix mon cher Bessem,
Tu es parti laissant derrière toi de très jolis souvenirs, je n'oublierai jamais ton sourire angélique, nos conversations sur la vie et la mondialisation, nos fous rires, les souvenirs d'un été 2015 ...
Tu es parti rejoindre un monde meilleur ... je ne t'oublierai jamais.
Jamel, Anneke, Shaeen et Alysa
Que dieu vous donne la force et le courage pour surmonter cette épreuve.
ولما لم أجد إلا فرارًا أشد من المنية أو حماما حملت على ورود الموت نفسي وقلت لصحبتي: موتوا كراما..... الله يرحمك عزيزنا بسام و ربي يعطيكم القوة خالي جمال،انيكا ,شاهين ،عليسة .... كل شيء في الدنيا تعب، إلا الموت فهو نهاية كل تعب.
Olfa Mohamed
Such a kindhearted and loving young man, I am so sorry for your loss
I’am so sorry for your loss Bessem, I hope you feel surrounded by much love !
الله يرحمك بسام
خليت علينا الفراغ
الله يرحمو و ربي يصبركم علي قد محبتو
My heart is broken for your loss.
May you and your family find comfort and peace in the happy and sweet memories of Bessem. Extending my sincere condolences during this very difficult time.
I am so, so sorry for your heartbreaking loss and am sending my deepest and most sincere sympathies to all of you. This is a beautiful tribute to Bessem. I am thinking about you.
I’ll always remember Bessem as the genuine, kind, hilarious and unique person that I grew up with and played and joked with every Wednesday for 10 years of scouts. I feel really lucky to have had a friend like him for so many years.
When I say that Bessem was hilarious, I mean that he was one of the funniest people I knew. I'll never forget, one year at some scouting event Bessem showed up wearing three watches, when anyone would ask him why he needed three watches, he’d laugh and tell them that two of the watches didn’t work. I still laugh when I think of that story. No matter what, Bessem always had a knack for making everyone around him burst out laughing.
Going through the photos, I thought back to so many great memories with him and our other friends, wandering around outside, starting campfires (often poorly) and laughing non stop on drives to our campsites. I’m lucky to have so many fond memories with him that I won’t forget. Although Bessem and I had not seen each other in a number of years, I’ll always remember him as the hilarious, happy, energetic and kind person I was lucky to have as a friend for so many years.
It is a truly sad day, and once again I am so so sorry for your loss. Bessem was a one-of-a-kind, and excellent person who will be missed. I'm glad I got to know him
All the best
Memory is to the mind
what "presence" is to the heart. It is in this way that our son and brother Bessem "imprints" his heart on our own hearts.
It is in this way that i
"re-member" you Bessem. Your open-heartedness. Your play-full-ness. Your sense of wonder. And, that part of your "longing" that was such a part of your "being."
We remember you now and always dearest Bessem in this "presence-of-heart" in this vibrant heart of "be-longing."
While I may have never met Bessem, I can feel that the love and thoughtfulness that was put into writing this beautiful eulogy are the same sentiments shared in the relationship between he and his family.
I understand that no amount of words can ease the pain that you must be feeling. But words is what we use to communicate. Please accept my deepest condolences on the loss of your wonderful sun Bessem. May God fill your hearts with love, strength and eventually resignation. My prayers are with you all. - Karinna N.
When I first met Bessem, it was as if my own son had returned home. His presence felt always so natural and cozy. He was so innocent, beautiful, pure soul. I got to keep him close to me only for that little spring and summer moment.
My love goes to you all. Bessem was one of kind and I was lucky enough to call him a cousin and a friend. He will forever be in my heart and memories.
We are so very sorry to hear of the loss of your son and brother. Words can't really express the depth of what you must be feeling or what we would like to say to you. But it is clear that he was loved deeply and that he knew it.
We are fortunate to have known Bessem through the Ottawa Royals soccer team that Jamal coached and on which Bessem and Zack played. We can remember Bessem's enthusiasm and tenaciousness and his infectious smile.
Our deepest sympathies.
I can't imagine the loss you and you're family are experiencing. Just know that we think of you often and at this moment you and your family are in our thoughts more then ever. Whatever you need, whatever you're going through, there's people who love you no matter how long or how far it's been. With all out love,
Kaitlin and Alvar
So heartbreaking to hear of your loss, Jamel. My thoughts are with you, your family and everyone who knew and loved Bessem. Peace to Bessem.
Chère Anneke, chère Alysa , cher Shaheen, cher Jamel, je vous connais peu mais bien assez pour avoir senti la famille aimante et généreuse que vous êtes.
Je me souviens de la gentillesse de Bessem. Je n'ai pas de souvenir précis mais le sentiment que c’était un jeune homme plein de bonté et c’est assez rare, cela m’avait saisi.
Mes parents et mon frère se joignent à moi pour vous transmettre nos condoléances, nous restons en pensée avec vous. Nous pensons aussi à ses grands parents, ses cousin.e.s, ses oncles et ses tantes, et toutes celles et ceux qui ont eu la chance de partager un bout de route avec lui.
Je vous embrasse.
Leïla Ben Aribi
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم(( يَا أَيَّتُهَا النَّفْسُ الْمُطْمَئِنَّةُ ارْجِعِي إِلَى رَبِّكِ رَاضِيَةً مَرْضِيَّةً فَادْخُلِي فِي عِبَادِي وَادْخُلِي جَنَّتِي )) صدق الله العظيم.
I was very sorry to hear about your loss of a wonderful son and brother.
The way that I remember all of you was how Bessem, his friend, his sister and Anneke all piled out of your car to extract my van that was stuck in the snowbank driveway that time in the past winter. I had no expectation of any help by passing motorists, and was gratefully surprised. This showed me how kind your family is as well as the generous environment in which Bessem was raised.
Please know that you continue to be in my prayers for this great loss.
Maria deSouza
Bessem, you were a precious and beloved friend. I miss you, and I pray you find peace. You will always be a friend in my heart.
Bessem was one of the good ones. As I said above, addressed to him, I miss him and always will.
Words are so inadequate, but they're all I have here. My heart goes out to you all.
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